You take me as I am
Into your new scarred hands
and when I run so far away
you always call me back again
into your open arms
not matter what ive done
amazing grace has found me here
because of what you've done, for me
PlanetShakers - Weight of the World
astO loves her friends, bowling, baking, bowling, reading, bowling, writing, bowling, ManUtd, bowling.
Kutless, The Lads, Switchfoot, MercyMe, Stacie Oricco, Avalon, blah blah blah
Astoria Needs to Stop Spending.
*Jason (Hsien Xian)
Image: [Double Rainbow]
Wednesday, January 31, 2007
You know, it's been three years and my dream has not diminished. I thought it would, then maybe I wouldn't be so miserable. But thus far, it hasn't.
I know now as an interior design student, I'm supposed to be researching on things related to interior design. I'm supposed to be looking up magazines like cubes, ish, etc. However, my favourite magazines are BBC goodfood, Olive, Donna Hay, Baking and Pastry Asian Pacific. I'm still more interesting in baking and pastry. Whether or not I can emulate the cake design, or whether I can make a centrepiece for an occasion, etc. These things matter more to me still, perhaps now more than ever as I come to the end of my tenure in TP. The only thing that mattered to me in TP is my bowling, the friends and the exposure that I was given by certain people to shine.
I feel as if I lost three years of my life. Sometimes I wonder why did I not follow my heart and insist on doing something I had passion for. Nowadays, everyday is like a dread, I need to finish my Finals, but I have no mood, I have no desire.
I just want that stupid piece of paper. That's all. Then maybe if pastry doesn't work out (which I highly doubt will not not happen), I've a backup. For all the money that dad paid, at least I have a stupid piece of paper. Whatever happened to apprenticeship, passion, desire and all? Why does papers seem more important than anything else?
Do I make sense? I don't ask for much really. Just the allowance to bake cakes, make chocolates with approval is all I ask. I'm happy doing it. I love it.
edit: Thailand players are sore losers. Wanting to boycott the match just because of a penalty.
3 More Weeks.
Saturday, January 27, 2007
I haven't updated for the longest time. I didn't really think I had anything to write about, besides Christmas and the New Year with the lads, but procrastination put it off. So here I am, slightly more than a month and a half late.
I did something different this year, for Christmas. Gingerbread trees, which surprisingly managed to stand upright, as I had seen pictures of amateur looking ones which were lopsided. heh, not implying that I'm good or what, just sharing that I was pleasantly pleased with the outcome. HAH. Oh, and chocolates for some people. Which to me didn't go as planned because I think I melted the chocolate till it lost its tempered temperature. Ohhh, what I would give for a tempering machine. I baked this year in my godma's house, which filled the entire kitchen with the smell of ginger, and I had to contend with 2 kids running in and out of the kitchen. Nathan was so cute, he refused to let me go and baked, instead I had to play with him and his Playskool bus until it was naptime.
I spent New Year's in the bowling centre (what's new right?). Last few hours before 2007 were spent bowling, and the few hours after that too. I tried cosmic bowling with my Rampage (a bowling ball, info for the bowling illiterate) and all I saw was my thumb plug and my finger inserts! Same case with all the rest of my bowling balls, cause it all had yellow plugs and inserts.
And the best (or is it worse?) was the reopening of school. All I'm left with now is... 3 weeks of school and my FYP is not exactly going fine. But no matters, because my dream is not to be an interior designer. So I'm just aiming for my diploma and then into pastry will I go into. haha. That's my dream, to be a top pastry chef, like Pang.
Sighhh, deadline's like Valentines Day. Sadistic sia I think the entire design school lecturers. hehe. Then Chinese New Year, which I will spend in the bowling centre again. hurhurhur.
I'm in love. With the show, hua yang shao nian shao nu. It's lovely really, and somewhat, I can understand the feelings of the main female character. All my mates treat me like a lad, which in some case is good, but in some rather annoying. So in that sense, I can understand how she feels. Oh well, I seriously cannot wait for the last 5 episodes. *impatiently walks around the room* no la, kidding.
Ok, I off now, I think I provided a well enough update for those who read, or maybe not. Because I don't think anyone reads it. haha.
edit: I lost my yellow pump bottle! sighhhhh. and my knee's got this sharp pain. YAY, and dinner with the lads again... I miss my best friends, and I want the green coloured snake from ikea (it's freaking 2 bucks!) arghhh [SHUT UP ASTORIA! WHAT ARE YOU RAMBLING ABOUT?!]
ok, byes. *waves*